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Promises are made everyday
So why'd I think you'd keep it
Promises are made everyday
So why'd I think you were different

Cause you'd said you would kill yourself
Before leaving me
Or that you would marry me
Cause your smile made me fly
Or your voice was so powerfull
Cause you said you would love me
Till the end or
Cause you pretended that you did

Promises are made everyday
So why didn't you keep yours
Promises are made everyday
Were you that different

Turns out the only reason I believed
You was cause you done all that
And I would still love you
Even though the truth was right in front of me

Kirsten Mocke

Still in my heart.... Somehow

I gave you it all, the whole of my heart
And now I wonder did you really love me in the start
‘cus now I see you as a heartless thief
A thief of my heart, and I find it hard to believe
That I actually could fall in love with a person causing so much pain
The hurt you cause is slowly driving me insane...

‘Cus I want to say it's not true and wish you felt the same
But clearly you don't, and who do I have to blame
Probably just myself for keep giving so much of me to you
But surely you are a factor of this pain too...

You see what I offer to you, but you're too much of a coward to look me in the face
And I still struggle to understand how you could replace
Everything we had and shared
And the thing that really gets me scared
Is that the cruel person you show now
Is still a big part of my heart, SOMEHOW....

Rabie Gesin

Dying to be perfect

What I see in the mirror is my reflection,
How hard I try just to get to perfection,
If I see the food in my plate,
I think about the bad things I do that I hate

I can't sleep at night
what I have become is a fright
i want to be beautiful and thin

Everyday behind me I close the bathroom door
bend my knees down to the floor
stick my finger through my throughout
tears starting o run down my cheek,
Why have I become so weak?

Why can I not stop?
Everyday I say this will be my last
I said it a few times in the past

But everyday the white porcelain calls me back
again, and again and again
It is a nightmare that will not end
Happy is one thing I am not
I want to be beautiful, pretty and hot

Why does is cause such pain
all my food goes down the drain
I am dieing to be perfect
I am dieing to look like the rest,
and to look like the rest my eternal rest come near
and I don't want to die,
That is my fear

Happy is one thing i am not
my teeth are starting to rot
Never again is what i say
But everyday my food ends up in the same way

Everyone says its all in my head
there is nothing wrong that's what I said
Is it Worth dieing to be perfect?
Is it...

Cindy Serfontein

---

In love with a surfer dude?

by Butterfly Kiss

Recently, a lady friend of mine, started hanging out with a cute surfer dude. Geez gals, am telling you, the only thing this bloke is talking about are cracking waves and the green room. She sometimes tells me "I wish he would talk more about my green room." Nevertheless, and like all gal friends do, I tried to comfort her and told her, that he is into her and that he just needs his space to hang out with his first and forever love, his 6.4 twin fin lady. Talking about jealous behaviour, forget it, don't let the green monster dominate you, you will never win the battle against the polystyrene fibreglass gun which is competing with you.

So she asked me what she could do to win his heart and get some proper attention. Honestly, such a simple question, because surfer dudes are just like all men are. No, they are not from Mars and actually, easy to handle. A good advice is to just let him go and roast his phat ones, because afterwards he will be freezing and needs a hot chick to warm him up, and that's way better for him than a hot water bottle. You can support him by hanging on the beach, watching him surf and taking pictures or you just taste the cold wet yourself. Sharing his favo hobby is one thing you can do, but you can also do your own thing and go for drinks with your friends or whatever makes you happy.

A long weekend was coming up and she was hoping he would ask her to spend the weekend with him, having romantic dinners, go shopping, watching a movie, or to just cuddle up with him on the couch, just like good old couch potatoes, you know, the proper couple stuff. Obviously endless wishing and hoping on her side. He left with his brus to Jbay to klap a mission. The disappointment was huge but for a surfer dude nothing is better than some good firing barrels, tanning a chop on the braai and having a couple of dops with his mates.

She texted him, called him, missed him. I had to stop her and told her that acting like a stage 5 cling on wont make the situation better. Actually, it can make it worse. She has to give up the faith that he will put his beloved stukkie in the corner for his chick, before he does that, he surfs the next corner in Kogelbaai and leaves her desperately waiting at home. So if you want him to spend a weekend with you then suggest it, don't just think about it. Guys won't know what a girl wants, you have to tell them. Maybe you should come up with a mushy plan for both of you, be his Sheila and cruise on this mission with him, have fun and enjoy days on the beach while meeting new kiff chicks or blokes. You will share a ballistic experience with him and this one will bring you even closer. Besides that, after good surf, he had a proper workout and you are the one who is allowed to touch his broad, strong shoulders and kiss his sexy ripped six pack. Consequently, it is a win-win situation, you get what you want and he is happy.

So, all in all, surfer dudes are easy to handle. Give him space, support him, be interested, do your own thing, suggest plans and not just think of them, he cant read your mind, and taste the advantages of a nature loving, handsome, tanned guy, who will completely fall for you. As for my lady friend, she just started surfing as well and he is more than happy to teach her. Now they are spending hours in the cold wet together and having special lurve-quality time afterwards.

Stay gorgeous,
Butterfly Kiss
x

---

We all have a story: a story to tell, a story to inspire and a story to remember. This is Desirene's story...

To the one who will always hold my heart in his hands...

"I swore I knew the melody that I heard you singing and when you smiled you made me feel like I could sing along.
But then you went and changed the words, now my heart is empty..."
I used to feel that way, but now I'm stronger and I've found love again. So this is where I close the chapter, tie up loose ends and try to say goodbye.

There was once a love song that stirred in the depths of my heart. A sweet melody that had erupted unexpectedly, a simple twist of fate...I wish I could erase every memory of you. I wish I could go back in time and make it so that we'd never met because maybe then I could have saved myself the inescapable pain of loving you.

I can't stop my heart from beating your name, or your face from clouding my mind.
I can't fight the tears that fall from my eyes when I realize that you and I will never be.
I don't want to admit that we never had a chance amidst the raging waves of life separating us.
My love won't stop flowing, yearning to feel the caress of your open arms.
But as I look at you these days, your forehead creased, the mischievous smile that plays on your lips as they part ever-so-slightly in concentration when you drive; my mind wanders back, not so long ago, to when just your smile would cause my heart to melt. And suddenly I realize... it's time to say goodbye.

I can't explain my feelings for you, but I know that you will always be the first breath of fresh air I inhaled, the first melody that tugged at my heartstrings, the first pair of mysterious eyes that hypnotized me... my unrequited love.
I wish that we'd held on to our friendship, cos I know it could have been a beautiful thing, but, like an electric shock cursing through my body, I know that everything happens for a reason.
So now, I've found the inner strength to let you go, but I need you to know that you're "the reason for the tear drops on my guitar, the only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star. You're the song, in the car, I keep on singing; don't know why I do...the only one who's got enough of me to break my heart"

And yet I know that even though you're my first love, you're not my true love. I don't even know you. All I know is that a part of me will always be with you...